Over the past 15 years, I have been to many talking therapies, read ALL the self help books, been on courses, retreats, travelled extensively.
I have absolutely loved, lost, and learned. I have grown as a person, and I fully honour that for myself.
When I moved back to the UK in 2021, I was confused, bitter and lost. All of the healing I had done seemed wasted.
18 months ago I found Shamanism and I knew I was home. I knew Shamanic Healing was something I had to share with the world (or Hereford to start with)
The healing I have experienced throughout the shamanic practices has been so profound that I will never be the same woman again, and nor do I want to be. There will always be full respect and pure love for her, I appreciate her fierceness, compassion and spirit. I have immense gratitude for her. For she guided me to where I am in this moment.
She lifted me up through all of my celebrations and protected me when I needed it.
She has thus far carried me through all of my darkest times, picked me up when I couldn’t, or wouldn’t rise. She remained strong and didn’t give up on me. Not once.
BUT.. she did live in FEAR.
Fear of the past, fear of the present, and fear of the future. She was frozen, overwhelmed, and fully in her masculine, not able to feel the need for trust and gentleness. Constantly in protect, fight, and action. She had lost her trust for so long that it had a serious impact on her life decisions, disconnected her from her intuition and she lived in ‘safe mode’ allowing her harmful behaviour patterns to control her, through her fear, feeling stuck and constantly searching for the next thing.
Fast forward the last 18 months and I now, fully trust that I have found my place in this world, and it is an exhilarating, although terrifying concept.
The biggest breakthrough for me is the deep sense of knowing I now feel. I can say, truthfully, that I know myself. The light parts, the dark shadow parts. The parts that make me feel icky about myself, the parts I am now able to celebrate about myself. I can now recognise them, embrace them, shine light on them and learn to grow with them.
All I needed to do was tap inwards, to parts of me that have terrified me for as long as I can remember. But I knew, whole heartedly that deep, dark work was necessary, so in true Carmel style I jumped into it, with BOTH feet.
Processes that I feel drawn to acknowledge throughout this part of my journey are…All of it was painful in some way or another.
All of it, when practiced with devotion, has changed an aspect of my life, with positive effect.
It’s all within me, I just needed to sit still enough and truly listen.
I feel truly honoured to have shared this immensely personal journey with the most inspiring women, with whom I will feel connected to until my roots leave this earth.
This weekend (May 2024) I will be embarking on a 9 day quest, to welcome the final piece of this puzzle. Initiation!
Carmel, as you know her, will not be returning.
This week is the pivotal point in my Shamanic process. Fully honouring the death of ‘her’ and welcoming in the birth of ‘ME’.
I am ready.
I’d love to share this journey and help you to start your healing, body, energy and mind.
Leave a Reply